no matter how fierce, naggy and shitty you are sometimes,

i may not have made you happy recently, but i still love you so deeply. it hurts to see you cry because of my wrong doings and it hurts even more to have to see you take your HBP medication if its all because of me. few years back, you changed my life. i was so rebellious and influential but as a mum, you've changed me to a better person, to who i am now. i may not be as decent as kampong girls, as soft-spoken and as obedient, but till today, i hope you'll know that i have no intentions to hurt you, whatsoever. i respect you for loving me so much, to the extend of controlling me and nagging so much at me. thanks for being understanding and sporting at times.. i hope matters at home will subside soon and recover as how it was, and i still hope that you'll love Danni too! nothing can ever replace you mama. and..sorry i didn't get you anything..

i love you, mama!

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-EDITED @ 9.11PM.

incase you've been wondering how fat i've grown in such a short period of time, well take a good look. i have pictures worse than those displayed above and maybe i shall post them some day. hahas! my tummy and legs are fat. i need to slim down because i love wearing my jeans and i don't wanna abandon my jeans if i were to grow any fatter and couldn't fit in it anymore! maakk ooiii!

& don't bother suggesting diet to me. it won't work because eating is my hobby. my bad. but i'm so determined to exercise and jog and cycle, but i don't have proper shoes to jog, nor do i have friends to cycle with at the moment. haha. lets just hope i can maybe cut down a little on my food intake okays.

i've told mum that i wanna work, and looks like mum's allowing me to. thats good. so now i need to consider about where i wanna work at. i thought of going back to CB because i love that place, but it won't be the same anymore without those people from my batch! lets just wait and see if there's any other better job offers. this is all because i need money to pay for my license and my wants! gggrrrrr.

ANYWYAS... its Francis's early in the morn tomorrow and then there's four hours of Saadiah's. Thursdays just couldn't be worse when its scheduled like that! oh ma god!!! Farahh, i need your PSP at times like this (since you ain't using it either. haha!). just a week more to go and then go and die with this term's lecturers!!!! hell yeahhh!!! C'mon Mira & Pot, say it with me, HELL YEAHH!! bahaahaa moohoohooo (okay this is irritating.) ((((:

i know everything i've just said is random, but still, you people bother to read them anyways. :D

i need to bathe now. sooo busukkk! good night ya'll!

p/s: altho a rank lower, but still like how Mira put it, "side by side or miles apart, both of you are still in each other's heart." hahaha. thus that explains why.. go figure!